Stages of Jewish Mourning

The Jewish process of mourning involves 4 to 5 specific steps that guide the bereaved through the first days, months and years following a significant loss:

1. Aninut - From the death through the burial, this is a time for burial preparations to be made, for candles to be lit and for mourners to sit with the body until the burial is complete. Once the burial is finished, the community serves the family a condolence meal, not to be shared with the community.

2. Aveilut - After the burial is complete, those family members for whom the death was of a parent, spouse, sibling, or child have a period of 7 days called shiva. During these days, the bereaved will not work, leave the house, wear shoes, or bathe. They will sit on low stools and cover the mirrors in their houses. The community comes to visit them, brings food, and participates in the recitation of the Kaddish prayer.

The recitation of Kaddish requires a minyan (a gathering of 10 people). This keeps those in mourning from isolating themselves from the community, and the community is continually called upon to be aware of those who are mourning.

Interestingly, the Kaddish prayer is not so much a prayer of grief and mourning, but a prayer acknowledging the greatness of God:

Exalted and sanctified is God's great Name (Amen)
in the world which He has created according to His will,
and may He establish His kingdom in your lifetime
and during your days, and within the life of the entire House of Israel,
speedily and soon; and say, Amen. (Amen)
May His great Name be blessed forever and for all eternity.
Blessed and praised, glorified and exalted, extolled
and honored, elevated and lauded be the Name of the Holy One, blessed be He,
beyond all the blessings and hymns, praises and consolations
that are uttered in the world; and say, Amen. (Amen)
May there be great peace from heaven, and life, for us
and for all Israel; and say, Amen. (Amen)
May He who makes peace in His high places make peace within us
and for all Israel, and say ye: Amen (Amen)

It is thought that during this time mourners need a reminder of God's sovereignty and those reminder will bring comfort.  (For more on Kaddish, visit Hebrew For Christians - Mourner's Kaddish.)

3. Sheloshim - For 30 days from the day of the burial (for the 7 above mentioned relatives), mourners leave the house for work or other necessary errands, but they do not participate in festive gatherings, listen to music, or cut their hair. They continue to recite Kaddish daily.

4. Shanah - For 11 months from the time of burial for those who have lost a parent, the bereaved continues to avoid celebrations and to recite Kaddish daily.

5. Yahrzeit - The anniversary of the death date is observed annually with the lighting of a candle and the recitation of Kaddish. The loved one, who has died, is also remembered with the lighting of a candle on the afternoon before Yom Kippur, the last day of Passover, the last day of Shavuot, and the day following Sukkot.

(More info on the stages of mourning can be found at: aish.com and  Judaism 101.)